Helping Your Children Cope with Divorce

Divorce can be a challenge for both adults and children. Guiding your family through such a transition can be difficult when you are still unsure of what to expect, too. There are some strategies that adults can use to help their children adjust to the changes of a divorce and hopefully ease the mental burdens. 

It’s also helpful to work with a divorce lawyer who understands these challenges and provides clear updates on your case. For more information on how an attorney can help, request a consultation with our experienced Fort Wayne divorce firm.

Tips for Helping Children Adjust to Divorce

Every family situation is different, and you’ll need to adjust your parenting tactics to fit your own children’s ages and emotional and mental needs. Here are a few points other families have found helpful:

1. Speak to your children and explain the divorce in clear terms, don’t count on them figuring it out on their own. If possible, have both parents be a part of the conversation to explain things to the children.
2. Comfort your children and reassure them that they will always be loved by both parents. Additionally, discuss how things will change. For instance, if your children will be splitting time between households, explain the schedule and other arrangements in detail. A visual element like a calendar can help with the adjustment and changes and to see that time is being spent with both parents.
3. Be sure to discuss the emotions that your children may feel and encourage them to tell you how they’re feeling. Letting them know their feelings are okay, even if they aren’t positive, may help initiate a conversation.
4. Remind your children that they are not to blame for your divorce.
5. Avoid bad-mouthing the other parent in front of your children. When this happens, children may feel forced to choose one parent over the other, creating further conflict. 
6. Make sure to give your children as much advanced notice as possible when changes will happen, like someone moving out or parents sharing custody. Look for positive ways to involve children in these changes, like asking for their opinions on paint colors or furnishings, which can help turn anxiety about a new place into excitement.
7. Think about working with a counselor or therapist who specializes in divorce. He or she may have additional suggestions to help with the transition and changes for your children. 
8. With all the changes that are going on, it isn’t uncommon for children to withdraw or change their behavior. Continue to reiterate to your children that both parents are there to support them. Continue with the open communication and “emotion check-in” discussions. As children get used to the changes, they normally go back to being themselves. 

Supporting Your Family through Skilled Divorce Representation

Although divorce is hard for both parents and children, it is often necessary in order to create a happier, healthier home life in the end. 

Having a skilled divorce attorney on your side can help make the divorce process easier. At The Bellinger Law Office, we handle your legal matters efficiently so you can focus on supporting your children. If you’re thinking about getting a divorce and aren’t sure where to get started, please reach out to us.