March 16, 2021
Unfortunately, the answer to this question will not be the same for everyone. Whether or not you should move out will depend on your emotional state at the time of your divorce, whether or not there is domestic violence in the home, whether or not the children are at risk, and the sentimental value of the home itself. And then some folks just do not deal with change or the divorce process very well. The following are some considerations when it comes to staying in your home while your divorce is pending.
In situations of spousal abuse, many stay within the home to avoid exposing their children to the abusive spouse. There is another way to handle such situations. You can remove yourself and the children from the home and then immediately file for injunctive relief against the abusive spouse. Your attorney can help you with this process. The Bellinger Law Office has handled many such situations before.
In some cases, the decision to divorce may be met with welcomed support from the spouse who has not made the decision. However, over time, as the reality of the divorce sets in and all the changes it will bring create stress and pressure, the spouse who did not make the decision to divorce feels a mounting pressure to attempt to resolve things. When it does not work, they begin picking minor fights with the other spouse. Eventually, these fights become obvious even to your children. Such fights do emotionally impact your children. If these fights are common, then moving out is the best solution.
One reason why a spouse may choose to live in their home longer than they should is to maintain the status quo for their children. Indeed, judges and courts love the status quo when it comes to children and will do whatever is in their power, short of exposing the children to unnecessary danger, to preserve the status quo and reduce the amount of disruption to their lives.
Knowing this, an argument may occur where chronic fighting becomes more than the family can bear. One parent moves out. The parent who still lives in the house with the children argues that the current situation should be maintained. The parent who moved out complains that they are being punished because they did what was best for the children. It is common to see these arguments in family court. You can avoid them by establishing a parenting schedule with your spouse the moment one of you moves out. This way, the situation for the children is still good, but the other parent does not feel penalized for doing the best thing.
Unfortunately, divorce is one of the leading causes of bankruptcy. Why? Because one household that was working together now must make the same amount of income to support two households. In other words, your mortgage payments do not go away because you have to pay for an apartment too. Additionally, food, bills, toiletries, and more will put a strain on your finances. However, staying in the same home may or may not be the best way to secure your finances during your divorce.
In most cases, the higher-earning spouse ends up footing at least half the bills for their old residence and another cluster of bills related to their new apartment. Still, this could be preferable to fighting endlessly with your spouse.
Some states actually require that spouses live apart for a certain amount of time before they can get a divorce. In these states, it is typical for parents to do something called “bird-nesting.” While bird-nesting may have been born in these states, it may be useful in states like Indiana, where spouses are not required to live apart before divorcing.
What is bird-nesting? Instead of splitting finances you cannot afford and move the children back and forth, the parents do the moving. They will live, off-and-on but on a regular schedule, inside the home. So, Mom might have the home and kids for a week, and then Dad moves in for a week. During that period, Mom might stay with family or friends, reducing the family’s expenses.
There is no real benefit to moving out during a divorce in the State of Indiana. It just costs more money. That being said, living in an environment in which you are constantly fighting with your roommate and causing severe emotional disturbances in your children might mean the best thing to do is move out. Only you can answer that question. The attorneys at The Bellinger Law Office can help you file the necessary paperwork and argue your side to ensure the court makes the necessary rulings to secure your interests. Call today to learn more about how we can help.
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