November 09, 2026
Introduction
Divorce mediation can help spouses resolve their case without asking a judge to decide every issue. A neutral mediator helps the spouses identify problems, consider options, and work toward an agreement. The mediator does not represent either spouse and cannot give either person legal advice. In my more than 20 years of practicing law, I have found that people are more likely to have a productive mediation when they understand their finances, know their priorities, and arrive with realistic proposals.
Key Takeaways
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What Is Divorce Mediation
Mediation is a private settlement process. A neutral mediator helps the spouses identify the issues, clear up misunderstandings, discuss possible solutions, explore compromise, and put any agreements into writing.
The mediator does not act as a judge. The mediator normally cannot force either spouse to accept a proposal. Indiana’s mediation rules require the parties to participate in good faith, but they do not require the parties to reach an agreement.
A court may order the parties to attend mediation. The spouses may also agree to mediate without being ordered to do so. Mediation can settle the entire divorce or only some of the disputed issues. Mediation sessions are generally confidential and closed to the public. Information that could be discovered outside mediation does not become protected simply because it was discussed during mediation.
1. What Issues Should You Be Prepared to Discuss During Divorce Mediation
Every divorce is different, but most Indiana divorce mediations involve several common subjects.
Property Division
Be prepared to discuss the marital home, other real estate, bank accounts, retirement benefits, investments, vehicles, businesses, household goods, stock options, restricted stock units, insurance cash values, tax matters, and property received by inheritance or gift.
For each item, try to know what it is worth, how it is titled, when it was acquired, and whether a debt is connected to it.
Debts and Financial Support
You may need to discuss mortgages, home-equity loans, credit cards, vehicle loans, personal loans, medical bills, student loans, business debts, and unpaid taxes. You may also need to address child support, health insurance, uninsured medical expenses, childcare costs, educational expenses, spousal maintenance, temporary payments, attorney fees, and mediation costs.
A divorce order may require one spouse to pay a joint debt. However, the order does not automatically remove the other spouse’s name from the creditor’s contract. Refinancing, selling property, or paying off a joint debt may be necessary.
Children
Parents should be ready to discuss legal custody, physical custody, the regular parenting schedule, holidays, school breaks, transportation, school decisions, medical care, counseling, religion, activities, communication, travel, relocation, and how future disagreements will be handled.
Professional Insight: Mediation often slows down when a spouse says, ‘I have not thought about that.’ Before mediation, make a list of every unresolved issue. Discuss each item with your attorney and decide what result you will request.
2. What Financial Documents Should You Gather Before Divorce Mediation
Good decisions require reliable information. Gather your records early enough for your attorney to review them.
Income Records
- Recent pay stubs and employment benefit summaries.
- W-2 and 1099 forms.
- Federal and state income tax returns.
- Records of bonuses, commissions, and overtime.
- Business, rental, retirement, disability, or benefit income records.
Asset and Debt Records
- Checking, savings, investment, cryptocurrency, and college savings statements.
- Retirement, pension, profit-sharing, and deferred compensation statements.
- Deeds, mortgage statements, property tax records, and appraisals.
- Credit card, vehicle, student, medical, tax, personal, and business debt statements.
- Vehicle titles, life insurance statements, and stock option or RSU records.
- Business tax returns, profit-and-loss statements, balance sheets, and ownership documents.
- Prenuptial or postnuptial agreements and records of gifts, inheritances, or premarital property.
Indiana’s online court resources include a financial declaration tool used to provide information about income, expenses, assets, and debts. Your county may require a particular financial disclosure form.
Professional Insight: Do not leave out an account because you believe it belongs only to you. Your attorney needs the full picture before giving advice. Missing information can delay mediation and make settlement less likely.
3. How Should You Prepare to Discuss Property Division and Financial Support
Prepare a complete list of assets and debts. For each item, include the owner, estimated value or balance, date acquired, any claim that it was owned before the marriage, supporting documents, and what you propose should happen to it.
If you want to keep the marital home, consider whether you can afford the mortgage, taxes, insurance, and repairs. Decide whether you can refinance the loan, pay the other spouse for part of the equity, or use other property to balance the division.
Prepare a realistic monthly budget. Include housing, food, transportation, insurance, medical care, childcare, debt payments, and other regular costs. For child support, collect accurate information about income, health insurance, childcare, parenting time, and other relevant expenses.
Separate Needs From Preferences
- Essential needs: Results you believe are necessary for financial safety or your children’s welfare.
- Important preferences: Results you strongly want but may be willing to adjust.
- Negotiable points: Issues where compromise may be possible.
Professional Insight: A fair settlement is not always a perfectly equal list of individual items. One spouse may keep the home while the other receives more retirement funds. Review the settlement as a complete package.
4. How Should Parents Prepare to Discuss Custody and Parenting Time
Parents should prepare a written parenting proposal. It should be detailed enough to prevent confusion but flexible enough to meet the children’s changing needs.
- Consider the children’s ages, school, daycare, medical needs, and activities.
- Compare each parent’s work schedule and the distance between the homes.
- Plan weekday overnights, weekends, holidays, school breaks, and vacations.
- Decide who will provide transportation and where exchanges will occur.
- Address telephone or video contact and communication between the parents.
- Include a fair method for resolving future disagreements.
The Indiana Parenting Time Guidelines are based on the idea that children usually benefit from frequent, meaningful, and continuing contact with both parents. The Guidelines are a model and may be adjusted to meet the needs of a particular family.
Parents should focus on what works for the children. Indiana mediators must make sure parents consider the children’s best interests and understand the effect of their decisions. Agreements involving the care, support, or property of children require court review and approval before they can be enforced.
Prepare a Sample Calendar
Put the proposed parenting schedule on a calendar. Include school days, weekends, holidays, summer vacation, activities, and transportation. Seeing the schedule may reveal problems that are not clear from a written description.
Safety Concerns
Tell your attorney and the mediator about domestic violence, threats, stalking, substance abuse, coercive control, or other safety concerns. Indiana’s rules contain protections for people identified as victims of domestic violence. A support person may be permitted, the mediator may use separate sessions, and mediation may be ended if the process may cause harm.
5. Should You Speak With a Divorce Attorney Before Attending Mediation
Yes. Speaking with an Indiana divorce attorney before mediation can help you understand what may be part of the marital estate, how property may be divided, whether maintenance may apply, how child support may be calculated, and what custody or parenting arrangements may be realistic.
An attorney can also explain tax issues, retirement orders, enforcement concerns, and the rights you may give up by signing an agreement. The mediator is neutral. The mediator does not represent either spouse and cannot tell you whether a proposed agreement is in your best interest.
If an agreement is reached, it should be put in writing and signed. In a domestic-relations case, it is then filed with the court. A court may enforce the agreement and may impose sanctions if a party fails to perform it.
Professional Insight: After more than 20 years of practicing law, I have seen people focus only on ending the case quickly. Speed can help, but it should not replace careful review. A signed agreement may affect your home, retirement, finances, and relationship with your children for years.
Indiana Divorce Mediation Checklist
Use this checklist with your attorney before mediation. Not every item will apply to every case.
Financial Documents
CHECKLIST ITEMS
☐ Three years of federal and state income tax returns.
☐ Recent pay stubs, W-2 forms, 1099 forms, and employment benefit records.
☐ Proof of bonuses, commissions, overtime, rental income, and business income.
☐ Checking, savings, investment, cryptocurrency, and college savings statements.
☐ Retirement, pension, profit-sharing, and deferred compensation statements.
☐ Mortgage, home-equity loan, deed, appraisal, and property tax records.
☐ Credit card, vehicle, student, medical, personal, tax, and business debt statements.
☐ Vehicle titles, life insurance statements, and health insurance information.
☐ Business financial records and ownership documents.
☐ Stock option, RSU, and other compensation records.
☐ A realistic monthly budget.
☐ Prenuptial or postnuptial agreements and records of gifts, inheritances, or premarital property.
Unresolved Issues
CHECKLIST ITEMS
☐ Marital home and other real estate.
☐ Bank, investment, and retirement accounts.
☐ Vehicles, business interests, and personal property.
☐ Division of debts and responsibility for joint accounts.
☐ Legal custody and physical custody.
☐ Regular parenting time, holidays, vacations, and transportation.
☐ Child support, health insurance, childcare, and educational expenses.
☐ Spousal maintenance, tax matters, attorney fees, and mediation costs.
☐ Pending motions, temporary orders, and any other disputed issue.
Proposed Arrangements
CHECKLIST ITEMS
☐ Prepare your proposed property division.
☐ Identify the property you want to keep and explain why.
☐ Create a plan to refinance, sell, or maintain the marital home.
☐ Explain how joint accounts and debts will be closed or paid.
☐ Prepare a parenting calendar, including holidays and vacations.
☐ Decide how transportation and exchanges will be handled.
☐ Prepare proposed child-support, insurance, and medical-expense terms.
☐ Plan how financial and parenting information will be exchanged after divorce.
Priorities and Potential Compromises
CHECKLIST ITEMS
☐ List your three most important goals.
☐ Separate essential needs from strong preferences.
☐ Identify the children’s most important needs.
☐ Consider the long-term cost of each proposal.
☐ Identify issues where you can be flexible.
☐ Consider different ways to divide assets of similar value.
☐ Decide what you would need in return for each compromise.
☐ Set limits on proposals you cannot safely accept.
Questions to Address Before Mediation
CHECKLIST ITEMS
☐ What issues remain unresolved?
☐ Is all financial information complete?
☐ Do any assets or businesses need an appraisal?
☐ Are there hidden, transferred, or missing assets?
☐ What is the likely cost of continued litigation?
☐ What are the tax effects of the proposed settlement?
☐ Will a retirement division order be needed?
☐ Can either spouse refinance the marital home?
☐ Does the parenting plan work with school and work schedules?
☐ How will future parenting disagreements be handled?
☐ What happens if a spouse fails to follow the agreement?
☐ Have you reviewed your settlement range with your attorney?
☐ Do you understand every term before signing?
Speak With an Indiana Family Law Attorney
The best way to prepare for divorce mediation is to know the facts, understand your legal rights, and arrive with practical proposals. Gather your financial records, list every unresolved issue, prepare a budget and parenting plan, and decide where you may compromise.
Mediation can give spouses more control over the outcome of their divorce. However, the decisions made during mediation can have long-term effects. An experienced Indiana divorce attorney can help you prepare, evaluate proposals, and avoid an agreement that creates problems later.
The Bellinger Law Office assists clients in Fort Wayne, Allen County, and Northeast Indiana with educational support, child support, and other family law matters. Contact the Bellinger Law Office by calling us at (260) 428-2214, or by clicking on the link below, to schedule a consultation.
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This article provides general information about Indiana divorce mediation. It is not legal advice and does not create an attorney-client relationship. Court procedures and local requirements may vary by county.
